another chance to get it right
Well, Happy NEW Year!
I’ve sat right here in front of my laptop and read a ton of blogs on how this year is going to be different, the resolutions that will be made or the un-resolutions ( a blog post which I love) and I’ve went back and re-read some of my very own posts from 2009. Boy was I ever a Debbie Downer . Blah.
Actually – there are a few posts that I feel like deleting – because I feel that they are very hurtful.. However, that’s what my heart was feeling at the time so – I’m in limbo about deleting .
I normally don’t make resolutions for the new year. Why? Simple. I never follow through with them. EVER. I can’t recall a year that I have stuck to my guns and completed a resolution. Failure isn’t something I want to continue doing, I mean come on, WHO likes to keep failing. Perhaps I can call it something else? Maybe resolution is a word that I link to failing year after year? Perhaps listing them here will hold me more accountable – and I’m hoping by doing so , I can look back on 2010 and SEE that changes were made.
So – in no particular order ..
* Recommit myself to being healthy. I need to lose .. I WANT to lose.
* Worry less
* Love more
* Blog once a day ( or so)
* Start taking pictures again
* Be honest with my feelings
This list could go on and on – but some of very personal and are kept deep inside my heart . I’m ready. I’m ready for a New Year. A New Year , another chance to get it right.
Posted by Chrissi @
12:32 pm |
drama llama..
Do you know what a drama llama is?
Do you?
No? Well.. let me tell you…
drama llama - definition- A person who randomly throws their drama on others,in the same way a llama randomly spits.
Every time I turn around there is something new being spewed out there. . blog drama, twitter drama. Blah blah douchey blah.
Seriously, what I have seen is snobbery to the extreme – To me, if you are more concerned with appearing “popular” than listening and learning from people, sharing and expanding your followers - I have NO time for you. When did Twitter become so “elite”
I’m finding that I feel like I do not have a place here on the twitterverse.. and kind of in the bloggy world. Perhaps it’s the emotional crapola I am going through?
I must bore you to tears when all of you 6 readers come to read a post. Heh.I was asked why I even blogged then – well…I never have claimed to be a writer like some - I just blog to share my heart.. just to share my heart.
Posted by Chrissi @
10:21 pm |
not letting me fall..
Love this..
Thank you SO much for not letting me fall this week.
Posted by Chrissi @
9:39 am |
His name is Dave – please support childhood cancer
His name is Dave.
He dontated HIS bonemarrow
To give our son a chance at life..
Won’t you do that too? Be The Match
September is National Childhood Cancer Awareness month and I will do everything in my little heart to advocate for children and families who endure this diagnosis.
Please show your support and become a donor..
Posted by Chrissi @
7:37 pm |
Mas Salsa Por Favor
August 20, 2009 recipe
I LOVE homemade salsa. It’s soooo easy to make and tastes so yummy..
6-7 roma tomatoes
6 green onions, chopped
1 lime, squeezed
1-2 chopped jalapenos (remember the seeds inside are what is really hot, so don’t just chop the whole thing and put it in unless you like it REALLY hot…)
1/2 onion, chopped ( I use sweet onions like Walla Walla or Videlia )
cilantro ( chop fine or use kitchen scissors )
salt ( start with 1 tsp)
garlic powder ( season to taste)
I cut the tomatoes first, and see how much I have, then add a small amount of everything and keep adding what I want until it tastes just right.
You will LOVE this. It is SO easy and deeeeelish!
Posted by Chrissi @
12:22 pm |
Yes, I am a sissly la la
Today were were talking about our fears . Everyone has them? Right? I mean – I know I sure do.
I seriously didn’t think any of mine were humorous to try to stifle a giggle – but apparently the people I was having lunch with thought differently.
So -yeah, what of it?
7 RANDOM things that make me fearful/afraid of..
- 1.Cockroaches – Never experienced them until Florida. Ew. Ew and EW. Seriously I saw some on the side of the buildings that I could have put a saddle on. Just .. EW.
- 2. Drowning: Just a little over 4 years ago – my son and I became stuck in a horrible current while floating in the river. IN THE SWIMMING section. That was the only time in my life that I was SO close to dying. It took 5 EMS and volunteers to get us out. The image of my son standing on the shore and hearing him scream is something I will never forget. Ever. That leads me into my next fear..
- 3. Swimming: I will only swim in a pool or a lake with NO currents
- 4. Lizards: They totally SKEEVE me ..
- 6. Driving over LOOOONG bridges.
- 7. Being alone. I hope that I am never alone in my life. That those who love me now, will love me for always.
You? What are YOU afraid of?
Posted by Chrissi @
11:29 am |
must you whine so much?
Seriously -
If you are going to have a blog – don’t whine about people stumbling upon it and reading it. And by people, I mean the WRONG people. Bosses, ex husbands, CURRENT husbands, families.
I am SO tired of reading people’s crybaby, boohoo whining about being found out. Sweet MOTHER, this is the INTERNET. Google, people – GOOGLE!
Recently, my blog was found and I had to reconsider what I had posted – I dealt with it and moved on.
Yes, it’s a blog and inherently public. Clearly, this is going to eat away at you, so you have to make a decision about how you are going to deal with it, So either delete your blog – make it a password protected blog or just quit yammerin’..
Maybe I’m totally WAY off base here – but uh.. I don’t think so.
Posted by Chrissi @
4:36 am |
So long… farewell…
In just a few short HOURS, our family will be moving across country from Tampa, Florida to just east of Seattle, Washington.
Crazy you say? Well , it’s just about 3200 miles – in a moving van , together ,for 5 days. Indeed , crazy – but very worth it.
Two years ago, our family made the move to Tampa , Florida. The hubs was offered a fantastic job at a trauma hospital . It was an offer we could not turn down. We packed up and made the big move – across country – seriously. ACROSS . THE. UNITED STATES.
We thought this would be a fantastic move , a fresh start. You see, our family has been dealt a real blow. Our youngest son, our sweet little chubby cheeked, smarty pants little man, lost his battle with cancer. The pain from this is hard to put into words – in fact, I don’t believe there are enough words to describe the immense pain a Mommy and Daddy’s heart feels from such a loss.
Sooo, the move was made. The job is and was well worth the move – however, our then 14 year old was miserable. We ripped him ( his words) out of the private school he had been attending from pre-k to half of 8th grade and threw him ( his words, again) into a new school, new people and a new life.
He hated it. He went from our outgoing son to a very unhappy, angry young man. In Washington state he was always the class clown, the popular and fun kid – in Tampa he was silent, made just a few friends and felt like he was not able to fit in. He tried out for varsity basketball and , thank God – he made the team. Hubs and I were sure that would bring him around. Even that, the true love of his life ( being basketball) did not do the trick.
This was his freshman year – a crucial year. Right before our eyes , we were losing another child – emotionally. My heart hurt so bad. I wanted to fix it for him , I wanted to just wrap him into me and hug on him. He wouldn’t let me near him.. ever. I don’t think we really had a whole heartfelt conversation that year at all. Seriously. So angry. SO very angry.
Moving fast forward here – the day that his school let out for summer vacation, he went to Washington state on a fishing trip with my husbands family. We had planned on flying up 3 weeks later for the 4th of July weekend to spend time with our Washington family.
I will never forget our son, greeting us at the aiport. NEVER will that image leave my heart.. and mind. He was smiling, and I am talking ear to ear smile. He hugged me. HE WAS HAPPY TO SEE US!! I was sobbing on the inside, sobbing from happiness. Our son was back. My heart was elated.
The first moment alone with my hub , I shared with him and I cried – how could I take our son back to Florida when I saw such a drastic and emotionally crucial difference in him? How could I put him back in a school where he was so angry, so withdrawn? Oh – and SO above, academically. He was an easy grade and a half above his peers. He was doing work he had done previous years.
Our family has been separated – by choice, for a year. We were SURE that my husband would have been able to relocate within a few months of our son and I moving back “home”.
However, the economy had other plans and we’ve been kept apart. Living apart – parenting apart . Difficult yet very worth making the sacrifice for our son.
After many resumes and a few interviews – my husband WILL be relocating back to Washington state. Finally – back together.
I will be blogging our journey – the hotels we stay in and the sites that we see along the way.
3200 miles of a journey, so very worth doing.
Posted by Chrissi @
8:58 pm |
we be jammin’
I’ve been using pictures lately to show what I have been up to. Aaaaaaand because I am lazy, I am going to show you what I have been doing today.
For some reason I have turned into Betty Homemaker and I am loving it!
Doesn’t that just look just yummy? Next on my list is peach jam.. Mmm
Stayed tuned for the next version of Betty Crocker!
xoxoxo
Posted by Chrissi @
12:02 pm |
stubborn much?
Great news – the hubz will be moving back to Washington state. He was officially offered the job last Thursday. For that I am SO happy and thankful for.
Recap: We’ve been living apart for the last year – with occasional visits to either Florida or Washington. Those visits were amazing, emotional and we were unsure of the future. Was I moving back to Florida or was he moving to Washington? We just did not know. .
Current: We just spent the last two weeks together – trying to adapt again. Even though we’ve been married FOREVER, it was quite the eye opener. Very obvious that we have been independent for the last 12 months. Quite frankly, while I enjoyed our time together part of me was extremely sad that the separation has changed “US”. Us as a married couple and as parents.
In all honesty – a small part of me is concerned of the readjustment of living back as a family. I felt like part of me was ripped away in the sense that I became both Mom and DAD – the decision maker, etc. The biggest challenge I see? We are both SO stubborn. I mean STUBBORN.
It was difficult to put him on the plane for Florida this morning but my heart hurts more because I feel that we have changed SO much.
That? Worries me…
xoxoxo
Posted by Chrissi @
10:22 pm |
